They Say Be Nice to People as You Go Up on a Career Ladder Because You Will Meet Them on the Way Down
We often hear it in passing: “Be nice to people as you climb the career ladder. You will meet them on the way down.” At first, it can sound like a cliché, a platitude repeated in HR meetings or motivational quotes. But for those who have faced the fragility of professional success, it becomes a stark, lived reality.
A client of mine shared her story recently, and it illustrates this truth vividly. She was ambitious, driven, and highly competitive. She excelled in her company, taking on the most challenging projects and consistently delivering results that outshone her peers. Recognition, promotions, and new opportunities followed. To the outside world, she was unstoppable, a rising star in her organization, someone destined for leadership.
Then, the unthinkable happened. The company went bust. Overnight, the infrastructure she had relied upon, the networks she assumed were solid, and the support she counted on disappeared. She found herself standing there with her achievements intact on paper, yet without the human safety net she assumed would have carried her through tough times.
Her experience is not unique. Many high achievers focus so intensely on performance, visibility, and advancement that relationship-building takes a back seat. Climbing the ladder often requires single-minded dedication, but when circumstances change, those you meet along your ascent, the colleagues, mentors, and peers, become essential not just as connections but as lifelines.
Why Relationships Matter as Much as Results
Professional success is often measured in tangible outputs: targets met, revenue generated, projects delivered. But these accomplishments are fleeting if not supported by meaningful relationships. People move on, companies fold, and roles evolve. The higher you climb, the more isolated you can feel, and the more dependent you become on the relationships you have nurtured along the way.
This is especially true in environments where competition is intense and visibility is high. When we focus purely on performance, we may inadvertently overlook the human element. Team members whose support makes achievement possible, peers whose collaboration strengthens outcomes, and mentors whose guidance provides perspective.
The lesson is clear. Relationship equity matters as much as professional achievement. Being thoughtful, generous, and authentic is not manipulation. It is preparation, resilience, and foresight. It is the foundation that sustains you when the ladder shifts beneath your feet.
Resilience Through Relationships
Resilience is often framed as an internal quality, the ability to endure, adapt, or bounce back. But resilience is also relational. It depends on the networks, connections, and allies you have cultivated. My client learned this the hard way. When the company collapsed, she realized that her relationships were not as robust as her resume. She had achieved remarkable feats yet had little relational capital to lean on in a crisis.
Coaching can provide critical support here. Coaching does not solve the structural or organizational collapse that can occur in careers, but it equips individuals to reflect on the human dynamics of their work:
Evaluating relationship equity: Assess which relationships have sustained you and which need cultivation.
Maintaining authenticity: Build connections based on respect and genuine engagement rather than transactional interactions.
Planning for uncertainty: Consider how to sustain networks in ways that provide support across career shifts.
Strengthening emotional endurance: Develop strategies to cope with isolation, uncertainty, and change while remaining grounded.
Through coaching, my client began to rebuild her professional life with a new mindset. Performance and relationships were intertwined, not separate. She learned to invest deliberately in her networks, ensuring she could both lead and be supported, even in unpredictable circumstances.
The Fragility of Success
The higher we climb, the more precarious our position can feel. Success is often visible and celebrated, but it is also temporary and subject to forces beyond our control. Companies restructure, markets shift, and industries evolve. Even personal reputation and skill are no guarantee against unforeseen change.
When the unexpected happens, it is not just your skills that matter, but your connections, allies, and relationships. These are the supports that make it possible to navigate disruption, pivot to new opportunities, and maintain a sense of stability and confidence.
For my client, rebuilding meant reconnecting with colleagues, mentors, and networks she had previously overlooked. It meant asking for guidance, accepting support, and acknowledging that career ascent is not a solitary endeavor. In doing so, she found a deeper understanding of what it means to succeed. Not just achieving individual milestones, but cultivating a professional ecosystem that endures.
Coaching as Preparation
Coaching plays a vital role in preparing for these realities. It provides a safe space to reflect without judgment, explore long-term strategies, and anticipate challenges before they arise. Through coaching, individuals can:
Assess their relational footprint: Which relationships are strong? Which need attention?
Cultivate empathy and reciprocity: Success is sustained when relationships are mutual, not transactional.
Build resilience for unexpected shifts: Learn to navigate career disruptions with strategic foresight and emotional grounding.
Reflect on values and priorities: Determine what is most important in professional and personal life, beyond immediate success.
Develop sustainable engagement strategies: Maintain connections and networks without overextending, keeping relationships authentic and lasting.
Coaching reframes the way high achievers approach success. It shifts the focus from “What can I achieve” to “Who do I become” and how to sustain both performance and connection.
Lessons from the Climb and the Descent
The proverb about meeting people on the way down is both practical and profound. It emphasizes humility, foresight, and relational awareness. Success is not only about the accolades, promotions, or titles. It is about the people who journey with you, around you, and sometimes ahead of you.
For those navigating competitive environments or ascending to leadership positions, the lessons are clear:
Be intentional in building relationships: Your network is both a safety net and a source of learning.
Prioritize respect and generosity: How you treat people today can determine the support you have tomorrow.
Invest in long-term connections: Maintain mentorships, friendships, and alliances that transcend immediate career goals.
Recognize that visibility has dual effects: Being seen is important, but overexposure without connection can leave you vulnerable in change.
Prepare for unexpected change: Emotional resilience, relational awareness, and reflection are essential tools.
The Human Side of Career Success
Ultimately, the story is about the human side of career success. It is easy to become absorbed in achievements, awards, or upward movement. But real, sustainable success includes relationships, empathy, and thoughtful engagement with others.
My client’s experience underscores a critical point. The higher you go, the more essential your relational and emotional preparation becomes. Success is fragile, and disruption is inevitable. But those who cultivate relationships, reflect deeply, and prepare for change are better equipped to navigate uncertainty while maintaining integrity, confidence, and resilience.
When we climb the ladder, it is easy to become focused solely on the view from the top. But the full picture includes the people who help us get there, the networks that sustain us, and the awareness that the journey is rarely linear. One day, you may meet colleagues, peers, or mentors again, not as a warning, but as a reminder of the enduring power of connection, generosity, and preparation.
